{"content":{"sharePage":{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"9689356","dateCreated":"1235851134","smartDate":"Feb 28, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"katieob","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/katieob","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9689356"},"dateDigested":1532767479,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Story 07","description":"I loved the story; you described everything very well.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9618180","dateCreated":"1235665690","smartDate":"Feb 26, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"claire2849","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/claire2849","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9618180"},"dateDigested":1532767479,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"comment","description":"I like this story because of its carefree, summer-like tone and the idea of a girl and her friend going to Spain for a summer, each for their different reasons is endearing. I would suggest that you add more characterization. I wish I knew more what Lila and Xander (great name, by the way) looked like, how old they were, and more about the extent of their friendship. I also wanted to know more about what the Spanish setting looked like. Maybe you could add more description of the Spanish style house? I liked the description of the pool alot, though. Good job.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9617774","dateCreated":"1235665364","smartDate":"Feb 26, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"fidan1993","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/fidan1993","imageUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/pic\/1235147613\/fidan1993-lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9617774"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comments","description":"Okay, by far the cutest story.. ever. I actually laughed. Not many grammar mistakes.
\nI really like the ending and the last sentence.
\nI think that a little more should be added to the story to make the ending even more intense. A little more having to do with Xander.
\nI like the name choices. They were all very interested. I used the name "Lila" in my story too :]
\n
\nLOVEEE the use of humor. Lightens the story up :]","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9617480","dateCreated":"1235665120","smartDate":"Feb 26, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"colangeloc","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/colangeloc","imageUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/pic\/1238686036\/colangeloc-lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9617480"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Setting Story 7","description":"I truely love this story! Great descriptions, I felt like I was right there feeling the same way Lila was. Surprising ending. Great Job!","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9615678","dateCreated":"1235663500","smartDate":"Feb 26, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"DrewGauvain","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/DrewGauvain","imageUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/pic\/1237994231\/DrewGauvain-lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9615678"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comments Story 7","description":"Positive: Great descriptions of your emotions as well as your friends in the story. I know what its like seeing someone that you havent seen in what seems like forever. You described that initial feeling perfectly.
\nSome of your dialoge is wordy. Also, the beginning could be better if you grabbed the reader.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9514516","dateCreated":"1235490820","smartDate":"Feb 24, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"desiree377","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/desiree377","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9514516"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comment","description":"This is very well written. I think that there were some parts that you could have elaberated on and some sentences didn't really make sense, so you might want to recheck them. All in all this story was enjoyable.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9513324","dateCreated":"1235490035","smartDate":"Feb 24, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"wihbeyj","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/wihbeyj","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9513324"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comment","description":"There was a lot of good description. There were a lot of similes, "My insides gave a little flip and felt like they had been through the centrifuge that we used in Biology to separate DNA."
\n
\nThere were a couple of grammar mistakes and some of the sentences didnt make sense:
\nand a chance to move on and prefect my tan.
\nI had determined that I was fully not telepathic and could not communicate with using a pencil and paper or my mouth.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9443510","dateCreated":"1235329850","smartDate":"Feb 22, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"dimariad","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/dimariad","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9443510"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comment","description":"Possitive: the way you described how she feld about Xander was so good. i thought the whole story was really good
\n
\nNegative: it might have fit a little better if before Xander kissed her while he was talking he said that he actually like her and not her cousin","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9403948","dateCreated":"1235147423","smartDate":"Feb 20, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"mmcferran","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/mmcferran","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9403948"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"comment","description":"Very well written!
\nI just have a couple of suggestions and questions:
\n1. you used Tia Carmens name a lot. Is Tia Carmen her whole first name or first and last. If it is her first and last my suggestion would be to use it once then, just use her first name.
\n2. You said that the house was spanish styled. Could you elaborate a little? There was some really good description right after that but I was just confused as to what spanish style is exactly.
\n3. The dust bunny part was really funny!
\n4. Could you simplify Gilly Hiak henleys?
\n5. Ebony pool water? Do they have black pool water? if so just explain that part.
\nAll in all GREAT STORY!","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[],"more":0}]},{"id":"9403810","dateCreated":"1235147256","smartDate":"Feb 20, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"etreb","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/etreb","imageUrl":"https:\/\/ssl.wikicdn.com\/i\/user_none_lg.jpg"},"monitored":false,"locked":false,"links":{"self":"https:\/\/sem2creativewriting.wikispaces.com\/share\/view\/9403810"},"dateDigested":1532767480,"startDate":null,"sharedType":"discussion","title":"Comment","description":"Positive: Very exquisite word choice. It sounded very maturely written and entriqued a lot of very good questions. At the beginning I loved how each of the people going to Spain had a elusive reason for going. It really allowed me to have a better character analysis of Xander.
\n
\nNegative: There were a few sentences that had some spelling errors. For example, "a chance to move on and prefect my tan". at the end of the first paragraph. Perfect is spelled wrong. I would avise spell check and revision. I know it is a lengthly piece but it would be very helpful and benefical to take the time to revise it.","replyPages":[{"page":0,"digests":[{"id":"9515524","body":"I definitly agree with Eamon on the postive aspect. Revising it would be beneficial and i love the character lila, especially the issues she was going with through her ex.","dateCreated":"1235491761","smartDate":"Feb 24, 2009","userCreated":{"username":"oliviah15","url":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/view\/oliviah15","imageUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikispaces.com\/user\/pic\/1222128529\/oliviah15-lg.jpg"}}],"more":0}]}],"more":false},"comments":[]},"http":{"code":200,"status":"OK"},"redirectUrl":null,"javascript":null,"notices":{"warning":[],"error":[],"info":[],"success":[]}}